Pussy Worship
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Thursday, October 19, 2006It's that time again, folks!That's right, NaNoWriMo has reared its ugly head again, and I am a slave to its demands. Guess I do have a submissive side after all, heh. Over the next five weeks I'll be very busy, caffeinated and addlebrained. I'll be here as often as I can, but I expect pet to pick up my slack. Will this novel be smutty? Oh yes it will. Will there be D/s...dunno. That is much harder for me to write--way too personal. Wish me luck for a second year win! Monday, October 16, 2006Note to MasochistsMine, anyway. If you continually whine and complain about something (say, slapping), your dominant will stop doing it. If nothing else, the whining gets irritating after a few thousand times. So if you like it, try to say THAT every once in a while. Dom/mes need reassurance too, sometimes. Monday, October 09, 2006AssignmentHaven't had one of these in a while--a public one at least. Hi pet, Go get yourself ready for me tonight. No promises, of course, but I want you prepared. I want you to last. So go get rid of the impatient boy urges you have. One orgasm, before you get home today. Do it quickly, and think of being by plaything while you do it. Then report. Love you! Friday, October 06, 2006Co-Dependency and D/sI'm going to speak abstractly, at least part of the time, in this post. In no way does this make me an expert on D/s, rather I'm simply building from my experience and making it less personal. There you go. Co-dependency is a buzz word that makes people who grew up in the 80s and 90s cringe. Overused, abused and misunderstood, there was a time when everyone was co-dependent. The fact is, it is a label for a set of behaviors and feelings that I think get mixed up with submission and service, and the resulting mix can be damaging to a couple. People who act in a co-dependent manner believe they are being self-less, but act in ways that are quite selfish. I've seen this phenomenon play out so many times. I want x, but I feel bad asking for x because I'm supposed to be submissive. But I still want x. So I'll probably do one of two things: 1. Not get x and resent it, secretly, feel guilty about resenting it, and present that to my dominant as acting really weird without explanation. or 2. Demand x after some period of self denial, as though my dominant should have known all along I wanted it. well and there's this one 3. Manipulate my dominant into doing x, using passive-aggression or other covert tactics. That last one is my least favorite, personally, and most likely to push me away from my submissive. None of these are particularly useful to a relationship. Every person has needs and wants, and every person deserves to get what is needed/wanted. As a dominant, I find myself deeply frustrated when I don't know what my sub needs/wants, and am put in a position to guess, or worse, to assume he wants nothing, thereby falling victim to one of the three things above. I refuse to guess. I refuse to be manipulated, and I refuse to deal with a bratty bottom who is needing something but unwilling to say what. In the end, his withholding of this information hurts us worse than if he just *told me*. This is a popular relationship dynamic, btw, not just D/s. But subs have the added difficulty of guilt. I'm the submissive one, it doesn't matter what I want. But that isn't true--it does matter what the submissive wants, both to the submissive him(her) self and the dominant. So it isn't, in my house, "she comes first". It is, rather, "what can I do to make her life easier today?" That includes telling me each and everything I need to know to make good decisions for us. My sub might not always get what he wants (as if I do, lol), but he always gets what he needs, without having to play games or get hurt. Um, unless he wants to play games and get hurt. Then I usually oblige. Thursday, October 05, 2006More HousekeepingWhat do you think, chance, fishnets with the short skirt? Sigh......someday. Anyway, as I deleted some, I went about the blogosphere and added some, too. If you run a F/m blog and I don't have you there, feel free to email me. I generally wait a month or two--we've seen these things tend to come and go, and hard linking is a bit of a pain--I don't blogroll. But I like to link to pretty much everyone F/m who isn't selling something, and even a few who are ;) Tomorrow, co-dependency and D/s. Wednesday, October 04, 2006CelebrationPet and I celebrated a lovely occasion together last night, complete with a dinner and a movie out. Pet did a wonderful job of being romantic, with several surprises for me (and I'm difficult to surprise, generally). We had an awesome scene, short but sweet, that began with him undressing me (corset, fishnets, etc), piece by piece. This was extremely erotic for me, being serviced in this simple way. I have my sadistic side, but this simple, clear kind of dominance really does it for me. Given the end result, I think pet enjoys it also. Tuesday, October 03, 2006HousecleaningPet in a maid's costume? Perhaps someday...I do love it when he cleans naked, though. But today it was link deletion. Sadly, sex and d/s blogs come and go, and several had gone from my sidebar. So, deleted! If you got deleted and you're still around, please drop me a line :) |
