Pussy Worship
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Tuesday, September 26, 2006And then...There are days I just take myself way too seriously. D/s is fun, why be so maudlin about it? Sheesh. That should go for all of us out here, too. I rarely find need to talk about how "it is" or how "it should be" because I'm no expert on anything outside my own life. But when I see people getting all riled up about this or that I have to think--just relax and have some fun people. Judgment gets us nowhere, nor does counterattack and side-taking. This is a small enough community as it is. Why not have more fun? You all need a good hearty flogging. Care to come over? I'm in a flogging mood. (not really, no stalkers please) I was flipping through old posts and found pet's drawings. We all need to encourage him to do more of this, after a month when his big project is done. My encouragement will come in the form of assignment, I think ;) Have you been listening to Fetish Flame lately? (I have. Nova makes me all wiggly.) There was a great series of shows on beginner's BDSM in the last few days. See link to the left there. I WISH WISH WISH I could have been at Folsom. Maybe next year. I want to be rough again. It comes in waves and here it is, waving. Poor pet (as if he doesn't love every minute--and complain every minute!) More fun, less belly button gazing. That's my new goal. Saturday, September 23, 2006RamblingsAh if only I was as eloquent as Lenora. I'm in the middle of a personal transformation, though the worst part of it all is that I'm not really sure where I'm headed--what the final transformation will be like. (not to worry, I'm not turning submissive. Hardly.) I've wanted to write about it, but it isn't even clear in my mind, so writing it out is difficult. The internal turmoil is related to power, personal power. I hit a rough patch in my own growth, and my sense of personal power was diminished greatly. I became adrift in my own self-doubt. It showed here in a sharp decrease of posts. It showed other places, too. I learn, I grow, I change. I am exploring my spirituality and my relationship with my body. I'm exploring the ideas of trust and faith--in myself and outside of it. As I've written and will probably continue to write, I am working on embracing my dominant wholly without guilt or shame. Seems to be going all right, when it works. I gave pet a nice reward for his hard work around the house this weekend. See, I'm not all sadist! ;) Friday, September 15, 2006YesAdded to the list of affirmations pet reads daily (or should...ahem): Lady always wins arguments when the subject is irrelevant (i.e.--who sang such and such song). Only Lady may declare herself wrong. *weg* Friday, September 08, 2006Blogger needs a DommeI've been trying to post for two days and Blogger has thwarted my efforts every time. Very irritating. Anyway, the trip was good, but served to remind me just how much time we miss out on daily. Pet wore his collar for much of the trip (though not out--we'll work on that ;). I had a lovely time. Coming home with the obligations of real life can be so frustrating! Pet has requested more authority from me. I believe I've written before about the inherent conflict of being a domme in love. I absolutely adore pet, and some part of me remains reserved about taking full control--after all, I don't want to hurt him or betray him. I don't want him to feel miserable in our life together, after all. Yet at the same time, he tells me he wants a heavier hand, wants to be guided and instructed. It is my nature to be dominant, but it is also my nature to be kind, empathetic and loving. Especially with pet. Not that I can't be all of them, but I've found there are times when I really have to choose--to do the dominant thing OR do the nice thing. Case in point--pet gives me pedicures around once a week. It is a lovely ritual we both enjoy, an open expression of D/s. Two nights ago he short changed me--he was tired and cranky and did a sort of "half ass" job then collapsed into bed. The domme in me felt slighted. But the nice me understood his fatigue--the man works very hard and deserves every moment of rest he gets. A tough situation. I chose nice. After a discussion later, we think I probably should choose domme more often. So that is my new goal. We'll see how I do. |
