Monday, October 03, 2005My Husband
I want to introduce my husband, not my pet.
My husband makes and brings me coffee each morning and evening. This sounds simple, but is compounded by the fact that I drink blended, iced mochas that he created in imitation of that big coffee chain. He makes them, gets upset when I DON'T ask for one, states he is proud I drink his coffee daily. His are better!
My husband asks me countless times a day if I need anything, anything at all. Often, he is put out if I respond with a "no, thanks babe".
My husband does the dishes each morning and evening, to my great appreciation.
My husband bathes the kids, puts them to bed, reads them stories, and helps them with their homework and other things. He gets on the floor and plays with the baby.
My husband loves to cook dinner, though loving something and being good at it are different ;).
My husband works a full time job, and I don't (ok, I do work for pay regularly, and I do the mom/domestic goddess thing, so it's not all bonbons and soaps lol).
My husband NEVER fails to tell me I look beautiful, to notice when I put time into my appearance, to tell me I'm sexy, or to otherwise be an awesome sweet man to me.
I quit talking about my husband to my vanilla girlfriends because they get truly angry and jealous of me. Treat me like I'm at fault for their harder lives.
I could go on for days...
I've been hurting over all this "am I a sub, am I not a sub" he's going through. I have no doubts I'm a Domme, so helping him through this time is hard for me. I feel...at risk, open and exposed like a turtle on her back. I know my safe zone is to withdraw into myself. Escape so I don't get hurt, remove intimacy and connection. I hate to do that these days, though, because I loose out on my time with my husband.
If our sex life is a constant, changing thing, so be it. It is where we are most vulnerable, most intimate, most connected and most close. We should be getting that right, and the amount of work is worth it.