Rule Number Two

2. Your wife has the last word. Be yourself. Give your opinion, feel free to make good points. When XXX is spoken, shut up and do what you're told. Trust her above all else, remember she has your best interests at heart.

XXX stands for a safeword, of sorts. We have a safeword, too, for BDSM bedroom play, and this is a different word. We've found, through trial and error, that pet reacts badly to certain requests. He often becomes argumentative and demanding--especially when he doesn't understand or agree. This isn't rocket science, most of us feel the same way. Except when you're talking 24/7 D/s or as close as you can get to that, we're not "most of us."

I get really irritated when he challenges my authoritay (Cartman-style), and he gets defensive and once again, we've totally left the D/s building. Because if I feel he's withdrawn consent, I stop, see. So he came up with the second safeword. This is MY safeword--my way to get him to quit arguing with me and do what he's told, my way of reminding him, in public or private, his chosen and cherished position in life. Truly, since we've set up the new safeword I've only used it once--I think it is a point of pride for him now, which works just fine for me ;)

We also did a little exercise over the summer that worked really well. Pet was having trouble trusting me to remember him in my decision making (despite, to his own admission, my NEVER having forgotten to take him into account). We put some mantras up on the closet door, things like "My lady always has my best interests at heart" and "My lady is not my mother," and the like. He read those ever day, and again it became a point of pride to keep those things in mind throughout the day. That really helped, too.